III WISDOM Common sense in an uncommon degree is what the world calls wisdom. Samuel Taylor Coleridge

 

The Chinese have a great saying, well, many if you appreciate fortune cookie philosophy, but this one says, “True wisdom is only attainable after 50.” If so, why is every young fk’n know-it-all willing to offer their little jewels to you?  It always seems someone has the answer to all your problems. Instead of just lending an ear, they all too often lend a mouth! Here’s a list of some of those little sayings that “friend” of yours always uses to impart his infinite wisdom.

Well, sort of.

Top 10 Useless Aphorisms

 1. An apple a day keeps the Doctor away.

 Maybe, until it’s discovered that the pesticides and genetic modification of our food definitely causes cancers we haven't even thought off. You eat organic you say? Good, but the unfortunate corollary is you'll have less money for the day when you're fighting off whatever else is going to kill you.

2. Every cloud has a silver lining

No, it doesn't. Not that I've ever seen. And if true then every silver lining has a cloud. And I've never actually found that pot of gold at the end of the rainbow either. And would you really want to meet a Leprechaun. Yuk.

3. Is the glass half-empty or half full?

Who the hell cares? You spilled half, you drank half, fill it up again. Of course it's half-full-why worry over the part that's not there?

4. The sun will come out tomorrow.

Well, let's hope a weatherman didn't come up with this cause then we know just how accurate it will be. What a pseudo science-just look up at the sky- blue= good, grey=cloudy, black =bad

5. You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make him drink.

  Sure you can. Why would it allow itself to be led to water only to stand there and look at it? It's thirsty after all that walking.

 6. If you want something done right, do it yourself. Well, that's over-confidence. Does that include brain surgery, changing an engine, and solving a murder case?  Let's face it- people have specialty's and can do most things better than you.

7. Never look a gift horse in the mouth.

Never look any horse in the mouth. It's disgusting: All grass, and hay and oats with big, nasty teeth. Yuk.

8. Everything in moderation.

 Except moderation. And isn't 'everything' very immoderate?

9. God works in mysterious ways. And, God helps those who help themselves.

    Well, if not that would assume you understood the mind of God. Cool. As for no.2, well, mostly at a buffet.

10. Catch a man a fish, he eats for a day; teach him to fish, he eats for a lifetime.

 Well, let’s hope you have some creative recipes because that's a hell of a lot of fish.